Sue Scheff: Great Parenting Practices

Finding Advice on Parenting:

If your challenge is teen parenting issues, a parenting expert who specializes in small kids is not going to help. If you’re having potty training troubles, you won’t get much assistance from a parenting expert who teaches money strategies for kids.

That’s why the Parenting Expert Teleseminar Series (P.E.T.S.) was developed: to provide targeted parenting help so you can get exactly the help you need for the issue you’re facing.

What does this site offer?

Hear free, live teleseminars with parenting experts who will cover every possible issue, or listen to audios in our replay library and confirm that the expert has the information you want, before investing major time and money.

Get recognition that you are your child’s parenting expert, and you need options so that you can choose parenting tips that reflect your family’s uniqueness.

About the Founder - Jacqueline Green

Jacqueline Green, BA, has taught parenting education for almost 10 years. She was overwhelmed with parenting her two-year old son and new baby girl so she decided to facilitate the well-known How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk course. One of her strengths as a parenting educator is that she knows what it is like to be able to manage a boardroom and yet be reduced to her knees by two little kids!

She also taught the Active Parenting course, before branching off to mentor with Dr. Gordon Neufeld, best-selling author of Hold On to Your Kids. From Dr. Neufeld, she learned how to use ground-breaking insights from developmental psychology to help her parent with more ease and joy. The better her parenting experience became, the more passionate she became about helping other parents who may be struggling like she was.

In 2004, Jacqueline started teaching on the Internet in order to reach more parents than she could through her live courses. Now she is the host of the Parenting Expert Teleseminar Series (PETS), a free teleseminar where she interviews different parenting experts over the telephone or by webinar. Eventually she plans to cover every conceivable parenting topic, so that parents can get an idea of what help is available before deciding to work further with one particular expert.

What makes the PETS calls even more special is that the people who sign up are the ones who come up with the content. That means the expert is addressing the most common concerns of the audience. This targeted content is much more interesting and valuable for parents than if the expert tells you what they think you want to know!

Jacqueline is also an Expert Author with Ezine articles, which gives her a chance to teach the developmental psychology gems that she's applied to her family to a wider audience. She feels passionately that the tips that have turned her parenting around would be much more widely used if they were better known. In passing on this information, Jacqueline is doing her part to transform the parenting experience across North America and the world.

Learn more: http://www.greatparentingpractices.com/

Sue Scheff: Teen Dating - Techno Dating Hints

One of my favorite parenting websites, Tangerine Times, just posted a great article on teen relationships (via technology) - ahhh, those summer romances now in the techno age! Who would have ever thought???

Source: Tangerine Times

Techno-Dating Hints

In this new age of dating with the full integration of technology; I’ve been thinking about how girls (and boys) can and should handle break-ups. Teens so fully integrate their social life with their technology it begs the question what to do when things break off or turn ugly?

What’s the digital protocol for keeping your ex “around” when you break up? He may be out of your teen’s life, but still in their cell phone with a special ringtone, a sweet picture that comes up when he calls — or on their Facebook page, even if he’s not making comments. Does your teen delete from him from their phone, and de-friend him completely? Even though they may not attend the same school, their presence in their digital lives can still linger and needs to be changed (for the most part) if they are to move on in a healthy way.
NOT an Expert on This…That’s for sure.

OK, obviously I’m not an expert and have no experience dating in this “techno-era” - BUT I do have some ideas you may want to pass along to your teen if you are struggling along with them with a ‘Break-up in the High Tech Era”…..

Post-Breakup

Right when your teen is fresh from breaking up - the ” post breakup” - the best thing to do is for them to gradually edge him/her out. That means they keep him/her in their cell phone IF they want, but should take off any special ringtone or the picture that came up when he/she called. This draws the attention away from the relationship when your teen is hanging out with their friends.

Facebook

As for Facebook, if the breakup was somewhat amicable, there’s no need to de-friend but they should avoid being reminded of him every time someone comments on a photo of him or writes on his Wall They can do this by changing their settings on Facebook to hide his/her updates. They can can stay FB friends but don’t have to know his Top 5 Favorite Songs or who is in a “new” relationship with. I’ve always advised my kids NOT to use the relationship status on FBook as I think it just makes for trouble and doesn’t give you a lot of flexibility to change relationships quietly.

Messy Breakup?

Messy, painful breakup? They should feel free to de-friend him/her, especially since Facebook doesn’t blare that info (unless they have a “relationship status”) and there’s no reason you need to keep up on his digital life, and vice versa.

And, finally if they have been hanging on to the digital vestiges of an ex, maybe they should cut them out of their phone and Facebook once and for all. It is the easiest way to lower visibility and “move on” in this day and age of techno-dating. Teens pay attention to cell phone ringtones, pictures on Fbook and friend status on Facebook. These are all markers they look for to figure out who is “with who”.

It’s all part of the “scene” now…no going back to the old days.

Sue Scheff: Tips for Finding a Teen Runaway

If you are currently dealing with a runaway, act immediately. Do not waste any time in utilizing every resource you can to find your child. Remember to call The National Runaway Switchboard at 1-800-RUNAWAY.

The list below details a plan of action and tips for finding help.

Tips For Finding a Runaway

Keep an updated phone list with the home and cell numbers of your teen's friends. Using the phone list, call every one of your teen's friends. Talk immediately with their parents, not their friends, as teenagers will often stick together and lie for each other. The parent will tell you anything they know, including the last time contact was made between their child and yours. They will also know to keep closer tabs on their own child.

Keep an updated photo of your child on hands at all times. With this photo, create one-page flyers including all information about your teen and where they were last seen. Post these flyers everywhere your teen hangs out, as well as anywhere else teenagers in general hang out. Post anywhere they will allow you to.

Immediately contact your local police. It is advised that you actually visit the office with a copy of the flyer as well as a good number of color photos of your teen. Speak clearly and act rationally, but make sure that they understand how serious the situation is.

Contact the local paper in order to run a missing ad. Also, contact any other printed media available in your area; many will be very willing to help.

Contact your local television stations, as well as those in nearby counties. Most stations will be more than happy to run an alert either in the newscast or through the scrolling alert at the bottom of the screen.

Having a teen runaway is very frightening and it can bring you to your "Wits End". Remain positive and be creative: try to understand why your teen is acting this way, what they are running from and where they might be running.

These are times when parents need to seek help for themselves. Don't be ashamed to reach out to others. We are all about parents helping parents. Please visit Sue Scheff™'s Parents Universal Resource Experts™ to find support and professional help with your runaway situation.

Sue Scheff: At-Risk Programs for Youths

The Army National Guard’s Partners in Education program connects schools, teachers, and students with free Army National Guard educational resources, from classroom presentations to programs for at-risk youth. Classroompresentations can be requested online, and topics include:
Partners In Education (http://www.partnersineducation.com/), a dynamic, interactive presentation that takes students through the steps needed to prepare for life after high school.

HUMVEE School Program (http://www.humveeschoolprogram.com/), a unique, hands-on opportunity that informs students about technical career directions while offering an up-close and personal look at the high mobility multipurpose wheeled vehicle.

YOU CAN School Program (http://www.youcanschoolprogram.com/), an award-winning program that offers more than 30 motivational presentations organized into the following categories: health and social well-being, life betterment,discovery, and disaster preparedness. It introduces students to necessary life skills in order to let them know that they can have successful futures and accomplish great things.

Sue Scheff: Mothers Against Predators

As a mother and grandmother, I am very fortunate my kids are not hooked online - maybe it is because the horrible ordeal I went through or maybe it is because they have other activities that doesn't give them extra time to surf online. Either way, I am silently grateful. I know the Internet can be an educational tool, but at the same time it can be a harmful, hurtful and potentially dangerous space - what is lurking online? Most everyone from every walk of life. Be an educated parent.

Mothers Against Predators:

Every time our children log on to the world wide web, they expose themselves to a world of strangers. Hidden among those strangers are predators who navigate the cyber world with ease. They exploit social networking sites to find our kids. They have even formed their own online networks, trading tips on how to reach our children. We must respond. Together we can reduce the odds that another child is hurt. Please join our fight against those who prey on our children.

Learn more: http://www.wearemap.org/

Sue Scheff: PTA Installs the First Male President

We are definitely in an era of change! An organization once known as the Congress of Mothers will now be lead by two men! For the first time in its 113-year history, the National PTA installs a father as its National President. That’s why PTA is offering an exclusive webcast, so you can be the first to meet the new National PTA President, Chuck Saylors, who will be installed at the PTA national convention on June 28th in Ft. Lauderdale, FL.

The webcast also features Byron V. Garrett, the organizations first-ever male CEO, and offers the opportunity for parents who can’t attend the convention to reap the benefits of asking each expert questions via email!

As new online strategies take the world by storm, Saylors and Garrett will focus many of their upcoming efforts on getting parents and teachers involved with new tools by offering conversation and updates on Facebook and Twitter, engaging National PTA members with these new Social Media platforms.

The webcast also offers information on important topics such as: strategic planning and priorities for the National PTA for the next two years, how National PTA is working with the Obama Administration and reauthorization of NCLB, positive impact of male involvement and ways in which men can get involved, and summer tips to stay ready for back to school season!

Watch the webcast for the next three months by visiting this URL:http://www.visualwebcaster.com/event.asp?id=59459

Sue Scheff: Encourage Your Teens to Give Back - Locks of Love

Learn more and encourage your teens or tween with long hair to give back to those that are in need due to hair loss because of serious illnesses. Summer is here, isn't it time to cool off and trim your hair? Think of the happiness you can bring to these kids.

WHAT IS LOCKS OF LOVE?

Locks of Love is a public non-profit organization that provides hairpieces to financially disadvantaged children in the United States and Canada under age 18 suffering from long-term medical hair loss from any diagnosis. We meet a unique need for children by using donated hair to create the highest quality hair prosthetics. Most of the children helped by Locks of Love have lost their hair due to a medical condition called alopecia areata, which has no known cause or cure. The prostheses we provide help to restore their self-esteem and their confidence, enabling them to face the world and their peers.

Mission Statement

Our mission is to return a sense of self, confidence and normalcy to children suffering from hair loss by utilizing donated ponytails to provide the highest quality hair prosthetics to financially disadvantaged children. The children receive hair prostheses free of charge or on a sliding scale, based on financial need.

Learn more: http://locksoflove.org

Sue Scheff: Teens Smoking

Source: TeensHealth

The health risks of tobacco are well known, yet the rates of smoking and using chewing tobacco continue to grow. Many young people pick up these habits every year — in fact, 90% of all adult smokers started when they were kids. Each day, more than 4,400 kids become regular smokers.

So it's important to make sure kids understand the dangers of tobacco use. Smoking is the leading cause of preventable deaths in the United States, and can cause cancer, heart disease, and lung disease. Chewing tobacco (smokeless or spit tobacco) can lead to nicotine addiction, oral cancer, gum disease, and an increased risk of cardiovascular disease, including heart attacks.

Giving kids information about the risks of smoking and chewing tobacco, and establishing clear rules and your reasons for them, can help protect them from these unhealthy habits.

You also should know the warning signs of tobacco use and constructive ways to help someone kick the habit.

The Facts About Tobacco

One of the major problems with smoking and chewing tobacco has to do with the chemical nicotine. Someone can get addicted to nicotine within days of first using it. In fact, the nicotine in tobacco can be as addictive as cocaine or heroine. Nicotine affects mood as well as the heart, lungs, stomach, and nervous system.

Other health risks include short-term effects of smoking such as coughing and throat irritation. Over time, more serious conditions may develop, including increases in heart rate and blood pressure, bronchitis, and emphysema.

Finally, numerous studies indicate that young smokers are more likely to experiment with marijuana, cocaine, heroin, or other illicit drugs.

Preventing Kids From Picking Up the Habit

Kids might be drawn to smoking and chewing tobacco for any number of reasons — to look cool, act older, lose weight, win cool merchandise, seem tough, or feel independent. But parents can combat those draws and keep kids from trying — and getting addicted to — tobacco.




Establish a good foundation of communication with your kids early on to make it easier to work through tricky issues like tobacco use. Some guidelines to keep in mind:

•Discuss sensitive topics in a way that doesn't make kids fear punishment or judgment.
•Emphasize what kids do right rather than wrong. Self-confidence is a child's best protection against peer pressure.
•Encourage kids to get involved in activities that prohibit smoking, such as sports.
•Show that you value your kids' opinions and ideas.
•It's important to keep talking to kids about the dangers of tobacco use over the years. Even the youngest child can understand that smoking is bad for the body.
•Ask what kids find appealing — or unappealing — about smoking. Be a patient listener.
•Read, watch TV, and go to the movies with your kids. Compare media images with what happens in reality.
•Discuss ways to respond to peer pressure to smoke. Your child may feel confident simply saying "no." But also offer alternative responses such as "It will make my clothes and breath smell bad" or "I hate the way it makes me look."
•Encourage kids to walk away from friends who don't respect their reasons for not smoking.
•Explain how much smoking governs the daily life of kids who start doing it. How do they afford the cigarettes? How do they have money to pay for other things they want? How does it affect their friendships?
•Establish firm rules that exclude smoking and chewing tobacco from your house and explain why: Smokers smell bad, look bad, and feel bad, and it's bad for everyone's health.

If Your Child Smokes

If you smell smoke on your child's clothing, try not to overreact. Ask about it first — maybe he or she has been hanging around with friends who smoke or just tried one cigarette. Many kids do try a cigarette at one time or another but don't go on to become regular smokers.

Read entire article here: http://teenshealth.org/parent/emotions/behavior/smoking.html#

Sue Scheff: Parent Secrets in Bringing out the best in your ADHD Child

Source: ADDitude Magazine

5 Parent Secrets: Bring Out the Best In Your ADHD Child

How to foster happiness and success in ADHD children who need a little help unwrapping their special gifts.

by Edward Hallowell, M.D.

Every child is born with gifts. A child who has the fascinating trait called attention deficit disorder (ADHD) possesses extraordinary ones, but they may be hidden. And if they’re found, they can be tough to unwrap.

I hear from parents who say they need a plan to help them do that. Well, your wish has been granted. I have a five-step plan, called the cycle of excellence, which will reveal your ADHD child's gifts for all to see.

The plan works best if you love your child in the right way. First, try to catch her spirit and essence. Watch, listen, and interact with her, and don’t direct or worry about getting things done. Just hang out with her. You’ll come to see who your child is.

Before she gets labeled smart or stupid, hardworking or lazy, athletic or klutzy, friendly or taciturn, engaging or standoffish, before she gets labeled ADD or XYZ, a parent usually senses the beginnings of who her child is. Hold on to that!

Second, don’t listen much to the diagnosticians. Out of necessity, diagnosticians oversimplify. We miss the subtleties, the complexities, and the richness that makes up the spirit of a child. It is sad to see how many children lose that essence growing up. You can protect your child’s spirit by noticing it, naming it, and nourishing it.

The cycle of excellence will do the rest. I have used it many times — and have seen it used by other parents. The plan will help your child do more than get by in life. She will thrive and soar beyond where she, her teachers, and even you may have thought she could. Now let’s get started.

Read entire article: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/5408.html

Sue Scheff: Teenage Drivers

I try to post frequently about teens and when they learn to drive. It can be one of the scarest times to be a parents. Recently, one of my favorite websites, Tangerine Times, posted an article on Teenage Drivers. Read on:

Source: Tangerine Times

With the recent acquisition of the “beginner’s permit”, our 15 year old is now driving. I’m trying to provide plenty of driving time behind the wheel because familiarity with the vehicle is my first goal. So many driving incidents require the immediate reaction of the driver. As a driver, you need to respond automatically, without thinking. I’ve been driving so many years (we won’t get into THAT number) I could close my eyes and turn the wheel in the correct direction if I was given verbal commands.

Yesterday, in fact, I had a near miss with a Smart car driven by a teenager. He whipped in front of me (there were 2 lanes - I was in the left) from a side street then slammed on the brakes and turned on his left turn signal - just 100 yards from where he entered the street. I didn’t even think, I reacted and thankfully the drivers around me were watching, saw what was happening, and moved out of the way so I could swerve into the other lane slightly. I slammed on my brakes but would have rear-ended him handily if not for everyones’ co-operation. I was inches from making that Smart car into Oreo cookie - ( I drive a van).

So lately, I’ve been a little more attentive to articles about new drivers. And when I read a recent article from AAA that said, “teen drivers kill others more than they kill themselves.” I thought, ok…can we take out the word KILL??? According to the article, AAA analyzed the crash data collected over the last decade by it’s Foundation for Traffic Safety and found that while deadly crashes are down overall, teenage drivers are still at least twice as lethal to other people as they are to themselves.

The analysis shows that about one-third of people killed in crashes involving drivers ages 15 to 17 are teen drivers themselves. Nearly two-thirds are passengers, occupants of other vehicles, pedestrians, cyclists and other road users. “For every teen driver killed in a crash, almost twice as many other people die, which underscores the link between teen drier safety and the safety of everyone on the road,” said AAA President and CEO Robert L. Darbeinet.

Nationally, between 1998 and 2007, crashes involving 15, 16 and 17-year old drivers killed 28,138 people of whom (36%) were teen drivers themselves. The remaining 17,750 (63%) deaths included 8,829 passengers of the drivers. AAA believes the slight drop is significant and points to it as evidence that improved teen licensing systems, especially the graduated driver licensing program, has made an impact.

Graduated Drivers License Programs Seem to Work

States with comprehensive Graduated Drivers License systems, overall, have been shown to reduce deaths among 16-year-old drivers by 38%.
Choice of Vehicle

Because most young people don’t usually have much money, they often drive older cars that don’t have the latest safety equipment — airbags, ABS, traction control and the like.

Second, because their vehicles are older, they may have more service issues that compromise their safety, such as worn brakes, tired shocks, bald tires, and so on.

Lastly, to save money, young people often choose economy boxes and small pickups, which have smaller crumple zones and fewer safety features.

Too many passengers

This last point is frequently overlooked, but has drawn attention recently. In a new study conducted by Johns Hopkins University School of Hygiene and Public Health, researchers discovered that the risk of deadly accidents among young drivers rose sharply with each additional passenger. The study, which looked at the driving habits of 16- and 17-year-old drivers, revealed a strong correlation between the number of passengers in a car and the risk of a fatal wreck.

For example, a 16 year old with three or more passengers faces nearly three times the risk of a fatal wreck as one driving alone. The study also found that young drivers are much more likely to engage in dangerous activates — drinking or using drugs, speeding, swerving, running red lights — when they are carrying their friends as passengers in the car. In California, we have a law that prevents other teenagers from riding in the cars with first time drivers (for the first year of their license).

Now…if we can only figure out a way to sit in the passenger seat while your teenage child is driving and NOT tense up. That would be a good trick. I can’t say I enjoy the experience as much as I thought I would.

Sue Scheff: Teen Depression

Be aware of your teens emotional needs. During the summer can be a difficult time if they don't have goals, plans and activities. Get them involved. If they don't have a job, encourage them to volunteer at Nursing Homes, Humane Societies, etc. Building their self esteem can help them feel good about themselves.

There are many causes of teen depression. The most common causes are:

•Significant life events like the death of a family member or close friend, parents divorce or split, breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend, or moving to a new school/area.

•Emotional/Physical neglect, being separated from a nurturer, abuse, damage to self esteem.

•Many changes happening too quickly can cause depression. For some teens, any major change at one time can trigger symptoms.

•Stress, especially in cases where the teen has little or no emotional support from parents, other family members, or friends.

•Past traumatic events or experiences like sexual abuse, general abuse, or other major experiences often harbor deep within a child and emerge in the teen years. Most children are unable to process these types of events when they happen, but of course, they remember them. As they age, the events/experiences become clearer and they gain new understanding.
•Changes associated with puberty often cause emotions labeled as depression.

•Abuse of drugs or other substances can cause changes in the brainÕs chemistry, in many cases, causing some types of depression.

•Some medical conditions such as hypothyroidism are believed to affect hormone and mood balance. Physical pain that is chronic can also trigger depression. In many cases, depression caused by medical conditions disappears when medical attention is sought and treatment occurs.
•Depression is a genetic disorder, and teens with family members who have suffered from depression have a higher chance of developing it themselves.

Learn more.

Sue Scheff: Inspirational Parenting

Inspirational Parenting is a site dedicated to that which uplifts and inspires those special people who make the world go round… parents. Anyone can post a parenting story, experience, article, or whatever you want as long as it deals with parenting. Registration is required so that content can be controlled to a degree. Registration is free and is done by clicking the “Register” button on the top left of any page.

We look forward to reading about your inspirational parenting experiences!

Visit http://inspirationalparenting.com/ and learn more!

Sue Scheff: Teen Gang Statistics

Today I Blogged on my main Blog - http://www.suescheffblog.com/ about Teen Gangs. Now that it is summer, parents need to be sure their kids are busy with constructive activities. Idle time can lead to trouble.

Read about Teen Gangs here: http://suescheffblog.com/2009/06/sue-scheff-teen-gangs/

Youth Gang Statistics

Youth gang activity is a significant problem in the United States. The following are statistics related to youth violence and gang activities:

•14 percent of teens are gang members (according to a survey in Denver)
•89 percent of serious violent crimes committed by teens were committed by gang members
•Gang members are 60 percent more likely to be killed
•The average age of a gang member is 17 to 18 years old
•25 percent of gang members are between the age of 15 and 17
•Police reports indicate that 6 percent of gang members are female and that 39 percent of gangs have female members

•Of female gang members:

◦78 percent have been in a gang fight
◦65 percent carry a weapon for protection
◦39 percent have attacked someone with a weapon
•Youth gang activity by area type:
◦72 percent of large cities
◦33 percent of small cities
◦56 percent of suburban counties
◦24 percent of rural counties
◦51 percent overall

•Youth gang activity by region:

◦74 percent in the West
◦52 percent in the Midwest
◦49 percent in the South
◦31 percent in the Northeast
◦51 percent overall

Click here for more.

Sue Scheff: Teen Help - Are you Considering Residential Therapy for your Teen

If you are struggling with your teenager, and realize it is escalating to a point of self destruction, drug addiction, gang affiliation, etc.... Don't be a parent in denial - be a proactive parent.

Learn more about Saving Your Out of Control Teen in my book "Wit's End!" You can purchase on Amazon or directly at http://www.witsendbook.com/.

You can also visit my website that offers guidance and information a very confusing "teen help" industry. http://www.helpyourteens.com/ - Learn from my mistakes and gain from my knowledge.

Sue Scheff: ADHD Family Summit 2009

It’s not too late to sign up for the 2009 ADHD Family Summit. And now is a good time to do it because this Wednesday, June 17, at 9:00 p.m. Eastern (8:00 Central, 7:00 Mountain, and 6:00 Pacific) Edge Foundation Executive Director, Sarah Wright, will be talking about how coaching can help your ADHD teen be successful in school, at home and in life. Did we mention that it’s FREE?

The ADHD Family Summit is organized by Rory Stern, a passionate advocate in the ADHD community. The teleseminars will be held throughout June on Monday and Wednesday evenings at 9:00 pm Eastern, and include access to a 24-hour replay line for people who aren’t able to listen in live.

Learn more: click here.

Sue Scheff: Help Stop The Choking Game

WHAT IS THE CHOKING GAME?

It’s not a game at all—just an act of suffocating on purpose.

Adolescents cut off the flow of blood to the brain, in exchange for a few seconds of feeling lightheaded. Some strangle themselves with a belt, a rope or their bare hands; others push on their chest or hyperventilate.

When they release the pressure, blood that was blocked up floods the brain all at once. This sets off a warm and fuzzy feeling, which is just the brain dying, thousands of cells at a time.

Help GASP stop the Choking Game before it hits close to home

The Choking Game is a misunderstood activity causing death and suffering for thousands of families worldwide. It often begins with high-achieving teens choking each other as a way to get high without the risk of getting caught with drugs or alcohol. It ends with thousands of kids dying or suffering permanent brain damage each year.

Set up by families of Choking Game victims, GASP is a global nonprofit campaign that fights this “game” with the most powerful weapon at our disposal: education. Most people have no idea how dangerous the Choking Game is until it hits close to home—but we can prevent suffering by publicizing the danger in our schools and homes.

Together, we can stamp out this deadly game in your community.

Learn more: http://www.stop-the-choking-game.com/

Sue Scheff: Summer with Teens

By Denise Witmer

Summer, the sunny season where parents of teens have to scramble. Either you’re trying to find something for your teen to do or you’re rushing to get them to work, camp or a pool party. Add in finding time to plan and pull off a family vacation and can anyone with a teenager really say summer is the time of year that things slow down? Not in our home! Here are some resources to help you get through the work of being a parent of a teen in the summer and have more fun.

12 Weeks of Summer Activities
Summer Camps
Summer Crafts
Summer Jobs
Summer Recipes
Summer School
Summer Vacations
Teens Home Alone

Sue Scheff: The Seven Secrets of Parenting Girls

By Dr. Janet Rose Wojtalk

Do you want the parenting secrets that have been used to raise the most successful women in history?

After years of researching the most successful women, Dr. Janet Rose has for the first time released this powerful guide for parents. Finally a solution to the question "What can we do to make sure we raise a happy, independent, successful daughter?"

Learn real strategies you can use today based on Dr. Janet Rose's award winning doctoral research into what some savvy parents "get" that results in happy, confident and successful daughters.

For more information visit: http://parentinggirls.com/7secrets_01.htm

Sue Scheff: Be Safe Online

It can be hard for parents to keep up with new technologies, and just thinking about keeping kids safe online can seem daunting. At bbesafe we can help by bringing together the most useful information we can find and access to software that you can use immediately to provide your children with a safer internet experience.

The main dangers children and their parents need to be aware of are: cyber bullying, grooming by sexual predators and the problems of posting personal or embarrassing information online.

Learn more: http://www.bbesafe.com/

Sue Scheff: An advice columnist reveals the perfect Father's Day gift

By Ellen Warren

A dad with no hobbies? No problem. I've got the perfect Father's Day gift suggestion. How perfect? Glad you asked. It's free. And it is almost guaranteed to bring tears to his eyes.It's the gift of your time. If at all possible block out some time to spend with Dad, just the two of you. Tell him you don't want to share him with anyone. No Mom. No siblings. No grandkids. Maybe it's just watching a ballgame together on TV.

As for the happy tears part, that too is going to take some time -- to think about what he really means to you, then telling him so in a handwritten note. Sure it's a lot easier to buy a card and sign it "Love, Your Daughter or Son," but I'm urging you not to cheap out emotionally.

Instead, recall -- in specific detail -- your favorite memories, what your dad has meant to you and done for you that you especially cherish and appreciate. Trust me on this: It will be the best Father's Day ever -- for both of you.Shop, drop, ask for help Yearning for a friend -- only better -- to tell you what to choose, where to look, how to get good value? Now you've got an angel on your shoulder.

Send questions to answerangel@tribune.com .

Sue Scheff: Parents, Teens and Kids Health

Welcome to KidsHealth!

If you're looking for information you can trust about kids and teens that's free of "doctor speak," you've come to the right place. KidsHealth is the most-visited site on the Web for information about health, behavior, and development from before birth through the teen years.

On a typical weekday, more than 500,000 people visit KidsHealth.

One of the things that makes KidsHealth special is that it's really three sites in one: with sections for parents, for kids, and for teens.

KidsHealth is more than just the facts about health. As part of The Nemours Foundation's Center for Children's Health Media, KidsHealth also provides families with perspective, advice, and comfort about a wide range of physical, emotional, and behavioral issues that affect children and teens.

To do this, our editorial staff communicates complex medical information in language that readers can understand and use. And all KidsHealth articles, animations, games, and other content go through a rigorous medical review by pediatricians and other medical experts. Ongoing, scheduled medical reviews ensure the information is as up-to-date as possible.

Along the way, KidsHealth has received its share of recognition — among them, four Webby Awards, including for Best Family/Parenting Site and Best Health Site on the Web, the Parent's Choice Gold Award, the Teacher's Choice Award for Family, and the International Pirelli Award for best educational media for students.

KidsHealth cannot take the place of an in-person visit with a doctor, who can perform examinations and answer questions. But we can provide unbiased, reliable information to help you and your family pursue good health and wellness for a lifetime.

Nemours Center for Children's Health Media

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Our recent projects include The Pink Locker Society, a novel that aims to educate and entertain preteen girls; and the Healthy Habits for Life Resource Kit, a DVD and 100-page booklet — produced in collaboration with Sesame Workshop — that helps preschool teachers incorporate healthy physical activity and nutrition habits into everyday routines. We also created Fit Kids, published worldwide by Dorling Kindersley, an illustrated book to help parents keep their kids and teens eating healthy and active.

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Sue Scheff: Facebook Do's and Dont's from MomLogic

Source: MomLogic.com

Here's all you need to know, courtesy of MomLogic contributor and Internet Safety Specialist Lori Getz.

There's no doubt that manners are important. But who knew that there would be a whole new set of etiquette for online interactions? Well, there are. In part two of our Cyber Safety series, find out the do's and don'ts of Facebook.

Do: Check your privacy settings!Within Facebook, there are 3 "Settings" tabs: Account, Privacy, and Applications. These settings allow you to control everything from how your page looks to who can see what you post. Within the Privacy setting alone, there are 4 sub-categories, each with several options. It is important that you read through all of them and make appropriate decisions about who can see what!

Do not: Use friending to alienate or become "famo."A friend request is a precious thing. Do you remember walking up to a new friend on the kindergarten playground and asking him or her to be your friend? Well, welcome to the 21st century version. You don't want to use this power to alienate others, but at the same time, you only want to let people in that you know in the physical world. "Famo" refers to becoming Internet Famous. Kids love to "collect friends," whether they know them or not. The more friends you have, the more famo you are. People you meet online that you don't know face-to-face are strangers. It's just not safe to let them into your inner circle!

Do not: Use the Honesty Box to slander or defame others. The honesty box in Facebook is an application on your profile page where people can drop anonymous comments. When teens use this feature, it is usually to harass one another. That's just plain old cyber-bullying!Do: Control who sees your News Feeds.On the top menu bar of Facebook, you have 4 main options: Home, Profile, Friends, and Inbox. On the Home page, you see the News Feeds. These are status updates of what your friends are doing and thinking (much like Twitter). Make sure you know who can see these updates -- you will find this control in the Privacy setting. You wouldn't want to accidentally tell the world you are leaving town for the weekend and that your house will be empty.

Do not: Fall for Phishing scams.Phishing is the act of attempting to trick users into divulging sensitive and personal information by directing them to a fake website that collects things like usernames, passwords, credit card numbers, etc. Facebook has encountered several phishing scams where you will receive a link in your inbox directing you to a new page that looks like Facebook but requires you to log in again. DON'T DO IT! At the log-in page, the hacker is now waiting for you to type in your username and password so they can collect it. Hackers usually do this to steal your identity and break into other accounts where the username and password may be the same (such as your online banking account). If you are redirected to a page where you are asked to re-enter your username and password or any personal information, scrutinize it carefully. If you are unsure and don't need to access the page, just close the window and forget about it.

Do: Read the Terms of Service.Have you ever noticed in Facebook that it appears the ads seem to be just for you? That's because Facebook scans your posting and accesses your personal information in order to learn what you like and don't like. That way they can attach appropriate advertisers to your page. It's a great way to direct-market. Make sure you read Facebook's Terms of Service and understand their role in the content you post.

Do not: Poke incessantly -- it's annoying!I think this one is pretty straightforward. Poking is a way to let someone know you are trying to get his or her attention. But there is no message attached, just the fact that you received a poke. Can you imagine if someone sat next to you and poked you all day ... it would drive me crazy!

Do: Understand the difference between private messages and the Wall.The second option at the top of your Facebook page is Profile. This is your public Wall. Think of it like a billboard on Sunset Blvd. Everyone can see everything posted to your Wall, including passersby. If you want to send a friend a private note on Facebook, then send them a message rather than posting to their Wall. The Wall is not the right place to make plans or talk about personal things.

Do not: Use Facebook to send SPAM or chain letters.Not only are SPAM and chain letters annoying, they are usually sent to gather your personal information. A chain letter is created by one person and then sent to others. But every time you forward a chain letter, there is code in the e-mail that sends all of the e-mail addresses back to the creator of the chain letter. So don't give up your personal information or that of your friends by forwarding the e-mail. I promise you will not have bad luck for 7 years!

Sue Scheff: Balanced Parenting

"Helping families successfully balance the joys and challenges of family life"

Welcome to Balanced Parenting!

Are you exhausted at the end of the day with your kids?

Do you feel like you argue or negotiate with your kids day and night?

Are you worried that your kids aren't respectful?

Baby sleep issues?

Do you expect too little of your kids?

Do your kids expect too much of you?

Is your marriage suffering because all of your energy goes to your kids?

Together, we can tackle these issues and bring more peace and family togetherness into your home.

Visit for more information: http://www.balancedparenting.com/

Sue Scheff: Summer Activities for Teens

Denise's Parenting Teens Blog

By Denise Witmer,

About.com Guide to Parenting Teens since 1997

These summer activities for teens can be done individually, with friends or with the whole family. Each week has four different types of teen summer activities: Make This (Recipe), Craft This, Learn How and Get Out and Go! Each activity idea is fun for your teen. Check out week three's summer activities for teens now.

Sue Scheff: Parenting Tips - How to Stop Cyber Bullying

Source: ReputationDefender

How to Stop Cyber Bullying

Cyber Bullying is an act of aggression exercised online and is typically experienced by web-savvy teens and pre-teens. Cyber bullying, which can take place through social networking sites, forums, emails, instant messaging conversations, and blogs, are aimed at causing emotional harm on the part of the victim. This harm often takes the form of embarrassment, an attack on the victim’s self esteem, or promoting a sense of isolation in the victim through exclusion from social circles.

Cyber bullying, simply put, is easier to accomplish than offline bullying. While an aggressor bullying at school is easily identified, so-called “e-bullies” can hide behind the monitors of their personal computers, protecting the aggressor from the consequences of their tactics.

Human behavior among young people hasn’t changed, but technology and the scope of ramifications has increased dramatically. As the PEW Internet & American Life Project observes, “the impulses behind [cyber bullying] are the same [as those for offline bullying], but the effect is magnified.”

There is no easy way to stop cyber bullying, but there are ways to diminish its effects on your children. Below are a few tips parents and adults can use to help young people understand the potential challenges they face online.

Monitor Your Child’s Mood
Pay attention to your child’s overall mood. Do they seem quiet after spending time online? Does their behavior, aggression, or frustration levels change after they spend time on the Internet?

Teens and children are unlikely to outwardly admit if they are being bullied, largely due to feelings of inferiority, low-self esteem, or embarrassment at social exclusion. Pay attention to changes in your child’s behavior and ask them if they or anyone they know has had mean or hurtful things written about them online.

Talk to Your Kids About Privacy
Engage your child in an honest discussion on the contradiction of terms in the phrase: “privacy on the Internet.” According to the PEW Internet & American Life Project, 15% of teens said that someone they know had forwarded or otherwise posted online communications that they, the teens “assumed was private.” Young people often “copy-paste” instant message conversations or email messages meant to be private, and share them publicly for purposes of embarrassment, social exclusion, or simply malice. There is an easy solution to this type of cyber bullying, widely considered to be the most common form of online harassment: make sure your kids know that nothing published, typed, posted, or shared online is private. Encourage your kids to refrain from communicating ideas online that they would not want their friends, family, or peers to see.

Familiarize Yourself with Your Child’s Online Habits
Make sure you know what it is exactly that your child does when he or she is online. Is your child active on social networking sites like Facebook or MySpace? Studies have shown that young people who use social networking sites are more prone to have experience with cyber bullying, either as an aggressor, as a victim, or even both.

As logic would suggest, the more time your child spends online, particularly if they regularly share their thoughts and ideas on the World Wide Web, the more susceptible he or she is to cyber bullying.

Talk to Your Child About Community Responsibility
According to the PEW Internet & American Life Project’s data on online teens, young people who regularly create content online through blogs, web sites, or photo upload sites are more likely than those teens who do not contribute to the online community to report cyberbullying and online harassment. This data demonstrates that teens that are active in creating a positive community in which they can express themselves are also eager to police it, and thus protecting their community from damaging harassment and hurtful aggression.

Talk to your kids about the fact that their online community can be a healthy place to express themselves, if certain rules are adhered to. The more active your kids are on reporting cyber bullying and online harassment, the easier it will be to reduce its strength.

For more information on keeping your kids safe online, along with a guide to approaching online crime and privacy issues, visit http://www.reputationdefender.com/

Sue Scheff: Parent and Teen Communication - Let's Talk

Talking to your teens and kids about the risks of drugs and alcohol isn't has hard as you think. Time to Talk will help you talk with your kids.

The Talk Kit will help you with...

How to start talking
How to say it
How to teach kids to turn down drugs
How to answer the question: "Did you do drugs?"
Tips for caring adults involved with kids
A Practical one-sheet guide to the drug and alcohol scene. You can browse the Talk Kit online, or print out the tips sheets and information tools.

Visit: http://www.timetotalk.org/

Sue Scheff: Mom Talk Radio

The Radio Show for today's smart Mom's!

Mom Talk Radio, the first radio talk show dedicated to real-life moms. Hosted by Maria Bailey, author, founder of BlueSuitMom.com and mother of four active kids.

I was fortunate to be part of this show last year with the release of my parenting book, Wit's End!, and from my own experience, Maria Bailey offers a parenting touch on her show - with her own first hand experiences and her expertise in the parenting field.

Take the time to listen to her podcasts and learn more about parenting today!

Sue Scheff: Dare to be Real - Empowering and Inspiring Teens

Mena Gagne offers inspiration and motivation to tweens and teens through her seminars, programs, consulting and more. Take a moment to review her program - DARE TO BE REAL - at http://daretobereal.ca/

Check out what teens are saying about her: http://daretobereal.ca/testimonials/

Founded and led by Mena Gagné, DARE TO BE REAL Coaching & Consulting is a transformational youth and leadership development company. Mena is a Leadership / Relationship / Team Coach who is passionate about working with today’s youth (aged 12 – 19), as well as with committed leaders and teams within organizations.

Sue Scheff: Managing Your Online Identity

Source: Forbes.com

By Anna Vander Broek

You are who Google says you are.

They say first impressions last a lifetime and increasingly those impressions are made online. Perspective employers Google you. Ditto the cute guy you met at the gym. Your landlord can check out your Facebook friends as easily as your cousin in Kansas City. The bad news is that the Internet has made it nearly impossible to hide your past. The good news is that you can use it to craft your future.

Take Will Lindow. In March, when the 28-year-old Texan decided to ditch his job at advertising giant Omnicon Group to pursue his passion for composing music, he knew the first step in his career change was to redefine himself online.

In order to quickly re-establish himself, Lindow turned to Wix.com, a free (for basic services) Web site which allows users to create flash Web pages. He created a page highlighting his musical talents and ambitions and then sent the link to a few people.

A week or two later Lindow got a response from a director doing a documentary film in Dallas. Now Lindow's scoring the film. He's also working with a local Austin band and last week got a gig doing a theme song for a children's animation film. It's only been three months.

"I reinvented myself online," says Lindow

The first step to getting control over your online identity is Googling yourself. If you don't do it, someone else will. Douglas Rothstein, managing partner of Redstone Partners, an executive search firm based in Manhattan and Cambridge, Mass., will Google ( GOOG - news - people ) potential candidates. "We'll scratch beneath the surface and see what's in the public domain," he says.

Quick Tips: Managing Your Online Identity

Individual Google hits make a difference (no one wants to see those pictures of your knee surgery), but so does the larger story they tell about you. "Treat Google like your résumé," says Michael Fertik, founder of the online reputation management service, ReputationDefender.com. If your first five Google hits highlight your old job as a market analyst it may be hard to sell yourself as a travel writer.

After you know what already exists about you online, start reshaping that information. Establish a purpose. Do you want to use the Internet to find a job or promote a new career? Or do you simply want to keep your online reputation clean in case your Aunt Sally ever Googles your name?

Look at things in context. It's easy to misrepresent yourself through seemingly innocent information if it appears in the wrong place. If you want to build up your career as a beer expert, those Facebook pictures of you double-fisting beers will probably help. But it may not if you're trying to be a kindergarten teacher.

"Know what you want and who you are," says Fertik. This may mean you need to choose what to keep online and what to remove. You don't always show your serious side to your friends or your party side to your boss. The same rules apply online.

If you're unhappy with your Google hits, there are a few things you can do. Think about using a service like Fertik's own ReputationDefender.com, which can help you manipulate your Google results, among other things, pushing positive links higher and negative ones lower. Giant sites like Facebook, LinkedIn and Twitter will be higher in Google searches, so focus on those sites first.

Creating your own Web site is a great way to give yourself a professional edge and will usually float up to the top of Google hits. Redstone Partner's Rothstein says he strongly advises his clients to create their own Web site. "[Employers] are looking for someone who has taken the time and effort to put together their own professional site," he says. "It shows perspective employers you … will go the extra mile."

Ask for an outside perspective. "Start with your own opinion about how you're presenting yourself," says Fertik. "But then maybe ask a friend or a professional for some insight."

Most importantly, stay up-to-date. A new client to your architecture firm may rather see you can design an office space, not your high school tennis scores.

"Google is now a utility for every life transaction," says Fertik. "You have to keep yourself fresh."

Sue Scheff: Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, MySpace...What?

Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, MySpace…What?

Tips for Parents - Talking to Your Teens About Social Networking

NEW YORK, June 1 /PRNewswire/ — MS — It’s no secret young people growing up today are more technologically advanced than older generations like the Baby Boomers. In those days, communicating with friends was done primarily by talking on the telephone, writing a note or speaking face-to-face. There was no e-mailing, text messaging, IM’ing (instant messaging) or posting comments on each other’s personal Web pages.

(Photo: http://www.newscom.com/cgi-bin/prnh/20090601/NY24516 )

In schools today, instead of just passing notes, students can send text messages on their cell phones and communicate online with their bff (best friends forever) or with people they don’t know, and this makes it difficult for parents to monitor their child’s online activities. In addition to e-mailing and text messaging, communicating via social networking sites is becoming more common for both older and younger generations. In fact, in January 2009 Facebook alone reported that they had 150 million active users. In addition, according to Common Sense Media, 55 percent of teens have an online profile on social networking sites like Facebook or MySpace.

"Social networking sites can be great resources for staying in contact with people, reconnecting with old friends, meeting people with common interests, and getting questions answered, but unfortunately not everyone who uses the Internet and social networking sites has honest intentions,” said Jay Opperman, Senior Director of Security and Privacy at Comcast.

What does this all mean? It means that parents should: 1) become familiar with online social networks like Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and MySpace; and 2) talk to your children about the importance of being safe and smart while communicating online.

Here are a few tips to keep in mind when talking to your teens about the Internet and social networks:

TIP 1 — Choose your pictures wisely: Pictures can say a thousand words. If you decide to post a picture of yourself online, be very cautious about what you post.

“Do not use a picture that will embarrass you five years down the road because even if you delete the picture, it will never go away. What goes online, stays online,” said Opperman. “Think about these questions: If I post this picture, could it prevent me from getting a scholarship or a job in the future? What if the person or persons I share my picture with, shares it with others?”

TIP 2 — Don’t talk to strangers and use privacy settings: Sometimes people aren’t always who they say they are and the Internet provides an additional means of being anonymous. Remember, everyone in the world doesn’t have your best interests at heart and some people are looking to prey on children and teens online. Social networking sites have privacy settings so you can control who can see your personal page. The settings can’t protect you 100 percent, but they are helpful so make sure you set up a privacy setting so only your friends can see your page.

TIP 3 — Keep your personal information personal: Don’t share personal information such as your last name, parents’ or siblings’ names, phone number, address, social security number or where you like to hang out. People with dishonest intentions can use this information to find you or steal your identity.

TIP 4 — Don’t be a cyberbully: Don’t bully people online or in person. You wouldn’t appreciate a schoolmate or even a stranger posting embarrassing or harassing information about you or threatening you online so don’t do that to someone else. Online, this is called cyberbullying, and now more and more states are passing anti-cyberbullying laws.

TIP 5 — Go outside and stay active: Technology is fascinating and it keeps us connected in so many ways, but don’t let the Internet disconnect you from other things that are important in life. Spend time with family and friends in person. Walk the dog, learn how to play an instrument, get involved in sports and other extracurricular after-school activities. Real life connections with family, friends and those most important to you should be one of your top priorities.

For more Internet safety tips and resources visit www.comcast.net/security .

SOURCE Comcast Security

Sue Scheff: Summer Camp Jobs

Summer Camp Jobs

Camp Staff ApplicantsLooking for a summer camp job?

Since 1999, MySummers has proved to be a great resource for applicants looking to work at a summer camp. Working as a camp counselor is one of the most meaningful summer jobs you will ever have.

Campers always remember their counselors, and the impact that each counselor has had on their lives. For future teachers, camp jobs are a great way to gain experience working with and living with children.

At MySummers, you will be registering with one of the top resources in the country for camp directors and for future staff. After registering, you will be contacted directly by e-mail or phone, by interested camp directors. It doesn’t get any better!

For more information about how this site can work for you, click here.Camp Directors "Owners & Program Directors" love our automated process for sending the best possible camp counselors.

Applications directly e-mailed to you! (no time consuming searches)

Unlimited Job Postings

To see how Mysummers can be put to work for you, review our Benefits for Camp Directors.If you have any questions or comments please contact us.