Showing posts with label parenting teens. Show all posts
Showing posts with label parenting teens. Show all posts

Thursday, April 16, 2015

Social Media: Is It The New Drug of Choice for Teens?

When you think of drugs, most think of cocaine, marijuana, molly, crack, ecstasy, etc…
Years ago when Facebook hit the scene no one really knew what to expect from the website.
The site was exclusive to college students and allowed them to keep in touch with their friends at different colleges… and that’s it.
Fast forward to today and social media, which has grown far beyond just Facebook with the addition of websites like Twitter and YouTube, has become an addiction that doesn’t just encompass college students, it encompasses teens, parents, and grandparents alike. Even our pets have their own Facebook pages or Twitter accounts.
Don’t believe that social media is a metaphorical type of drug? Let’s compare.
1. It fills a self-imposed boredom: How many times have you heard someone say, “well I just get on to [Facebook, Twitter, etc.] when I’m bored”? People spend more time being “bored” than ever before. Instead of getting out and doing something we choose to spend our time inside on a computer checking up on other people’s lives and connecting with our friends through websites. Like a drug taking up all of our free time that could be spent doing something productive, instead we opt to fill our free time with social media.
2. It gives highs and lows: What about when you log onto a social media website and see that you have new notifications or connections? There is that instant high that someone has reached out to you publicly on a social media site. We crave social media popularity. It’s addicting. We need the gratification and we get jealous when we see other people are more popular and depressed when no one has tagged us in anything.
3. It’s used as a reward: Finish a project? Check Twitter. Write an article? Check Facebook. Check off items on a to-do list? Check blogs. We use social media as a reward for completing everyday tasks that deserve no reward, tasks that we should be doing because we are supposed to, not because it will allow us to reward ourselves with our next social media high.
4. It causes us to have withdrawals: Maybe the first time you noticed was when you sat at a stoplight and had to log onto your Facebook account from your phone… just to see if anything interesting was happening. Maybe it was when you couldn’t sit through dinner without tweeting something to your followers. Maybe it was the first time you got a pang of longing to log on because you weren’t around an internet. Whatever the cause, we suffer withdrawals from not being able to check in with our social media sites, just like drug addicts long for the next time they can get high.
5. It’s a tough addiction to break: As easy as it is to say that you aren’t addicted to social media as soon as you think about closing your accounts you’re probably met with that same fear that many people feel when faced with the thought of a life without it. How will you function since it’s become such an integral part of your life? Many of us have been addicted for so long that it would be incrediblydifficult to make a clean break from the constant routine of checking our varying social media profiles.
Social media may not be illegal and it may not come with serious physical consequences, but it is an addiction that we are facing, and our teens are facing it in an even greater way because they’ve been inundated into the social media culture at a much earlier age than our generation of young and old adults were.

Saturday, June 14, 2014

The New Drug for Teens: Social Media

When you think of drugs, most think of cocaine, marijuana, crack, ecstasy, etc...

Years ago when Facebook hit the scene no one really knew what to expect from the website.

The site was exclusive to college students and allowed them to keep in touch with their friends at different colleges… and that’s it.

Fast forward to today and social media, which has grown far beyond just Facebook with the addition of websites like Twitter and YouTube, has become an addiction that doesn’t just encompass college students, it encompasses teens, parents, and grandparents alike. Even our pets have their own Facebook pages or Twitter accounts.

Don’t believe that social media is a metaphorical type of drug? Let’s compare.

1. It fills a self-imposed boredom: How many times have you heard someone say, “well I just get on to [Facebook, Twitter, etc.] when I’m bored”? People spend more time being “bored” than ever before. Instead of getting out and doing something we choose to spend our time inside on a computer checking up on other people’s lives and connecting with our friends through websites. Like a drug taking up all of our free time that could be spent doing something productive, instead we opt to fill our free time with social media.

2. It gives highs and lows: What about when you log onto a social media website and see that you have new notifications or connections? There is that instant high that someone has reached out to you publicly on a social media site. We crave social media popularity. It’s addicting. We need the gratification and we get jealous when we see other people are more popular and depressed when no one has tagged us in anything.
3. It’s used as a reward: Finish a project? Check Twitter. Write an article? Check Facebook. Check off items on a to-do list? Check blogs. We use social media as a reward for completing everyday tasks that deserve no reward, tasks that we should be doing because we are supposed to, not because it will allow us to reward ourselves with our next social media high.
4. It causes us to have withdrawals: Maybe the first time you noticed was when you sat at a stoplight and had to log onto your Facebook account from your phone… just to see if anything interesting was happening. Maybe it was when you couldn’t sit through dinner without tweeting something to your followers. Maybe it was the first time you got a pang of longing to log on because you weren’t around an internet. Whatever the cause, we suffer withdrawals from not being able to check in with our social media sites, just like drug addicts long for the next time they can get high.
5. It’s a tough addiction to break: As easy as it is to say that you aren’t addicted to social media as soon as you think about closing your accounts you’re probably met with that same fear that many people feel when faced with the thought of a life without it. How will you function since it’s become such an integral part of your life? Many of us have been addicted for so long that it would be incredibly difficult to make a clean break from the constant routine of checking our varying social media profiles.

Social media may not be illegal and it may not come with serious physical consequences, but it is an addiction that we are facing, and our teens are facing it in an even greater way because they’ve been inundated into the social media culture at a much earlier age than our generation of young and old adults were.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Identity Theft and Your Security

Identity theft has become an increasing problem as our world shifts to being more online and mobile. Many people feel like there is no way to keep their information safe should someone want to steal it.

Is this the case, or are there things that you can do to make your information harder to steal?

These 18 blog entries touch on what you can do to protect your identity online, at work and when you are out and about living your life.

The press is doing an admirable job of bringing scams to light so that the public can be better informed and thus better able to protect sensitive information.


To learn what you need to know to keep your personal information safe, keep reading.

Online
With more and more people shopping and banking online, keeping your information safe from thieves becomes both more important and more difficult. Avoid common or easy to guess passwords, as many times you are making the thief’s job easier. For more online safety tips, take a look at these six blog posts.
At Work
While your employer likely has their own security measures in place, you still need to make sure that you are keeping your personal information safe from hackers or other co-workers. When you go to a meeting make sure that your desk and computer are locked. Don’t get your personal e-mail on your work computer, as that information can stay in that computer, even if you delete it. To learn more important safeguards, read these six blog articles.
Out and About
If you pay for your gas and other snacks with a credit card that you can tap and go, you may want to stop using it. While it’s a convenient way to pay for things, it’s also an easy way for a thief to pick up the credit card number at the same time. When you are out for dinner and you pay the bill by sending your credit card with the waiter, you may want to keep an eye on him. Specialized equipment designed to steal credit card numbers in a hurry have been found in various restaurants. Check out these six blog articles and learn more about identity theft scams going on today and how to avoid becoming a victim.
Source: Nanny Website

Saturday, November 9, 2013

Helping Your Teen Avoid Drug Use


Statistics have proven parents do make a difference in their child's decision to use drugs.

Here’s a quiz to see whether you’re doing all you can.

Give yourself five points for something you usually do, zero points for something you never do—or any score in between.

___1. I have talked with my teen about drug and alcohol use. She knows our family’s values.
___2. I know where my teen is and who she is with.
___3. I keep my children involved in positive activities like volunteering and sports.
___4. I know the signs of alcohol and drug abuse.
___5. I am aware of the example I provide.

How did you score?

Above 20 means you’re doing all you can to help your teen avoid drugs and alcohol. A score of 15 to 19 is average. Below 15 means you may need to talk more directly about drugs and alcohol.

Copyright © 2013 Parent Institute

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Teen Text Talk

When it comes to teens it can be more difficult and even more important to be a parent in the know.

Let’s start with 50 Acronyms Parents Should Know: 

(Courtesy of Enough is Enough and NetLingo)
  1. 8 - Oral sex
  2. 1337 - Elite -or- leet -or- L337
  3. 143 - I love you
  4. 182 - I hate you
  5. 1174 - Nude club
  6. 420 - Marijuana
  7. 459 - I love you
  8. ADR - Address
  9. AEAP - As Early As Possible
  10. ALAP - As Late As Possible
  11. ASL - Age/Sex/Location
  12. CD9 - Code 9 – it means parents are around
  13. C-P - Sleepy
  14. F2F - Face-to-Face
  15. GNOC - Get Naked On Cam
  16. GYPO - Get Your Pants Off
  17. HAK - Hugs And Kisses
  18. ILU - I Love You
  19. IWSN - I Want Sex Now
  20. J/O - Jerking Off
  21. KOTL - Kiss On The Lips
  22. KFY -or- K4Y - Kiss For You
  23. KPC - Keeping Parents Clueless
  24. LMIRL - Let’s Meet In Real Life
  25. MOOS - Member Of The Opposite Sex
  26. MOSS - Member(s) Of The Same Sex
  27. MorF - Male or Female
  28. MOS - Mom Over Shoulder
  29. MPFB - My Personal F*** Buddy
  30. NALOPKT - Not A Lot Of People Know That
  31. NIFOC - Nude In Front Of The computer
  32. NMU - Not Much, You?
  33. P911 - Parent Alert
  34. PAL - Parents Are Listening
  35. PAW - Parents Are Watching
  36. PIR - Parent In Room
  37. POS - Parent Over Shoulder -or- Piece Of Sh**
  38. pron - porn
  39. Q2C - Quick To Cum
  40. RU/18 - Are You Over 18?
  41. RUMORF - Are You Male OR Female?
  42. RUH - Are You Horny?
  43. S2R - Send To Receive
  44. SorG - Straight or Gay
  45. TDTM - Talk Dirty To Me
  46. WTF - What The F***
  47. WUF - Where You From
  48. WYCM - Will You Call Me?
  49. WYRN - What’s Your Real Name?
  50. zerg - To gang up on someone
Be an educated parent – you will have safer teens!

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Friday, September 27, 2013

15 Blogs with Best Tips for Your New Teenage Driver

Thinking about teaching your teen to drive might be giving you anxiety attacks, but with some careful planning and preparation it doesn’t have to. To help make the process a smoother one, it’s a good idea to start talking to your child about driving well before he’s ready to get behind the wheel. Your child is taking cues from you, so you need to model responsible driving skills, too. No matter how experienced of a driver you are, you’ll want to brush up on safe driving rules and laws before you start teaching your teen, as well as prepare some basic lessons for him once it’s time for him to start learning to drive. To learn more tips on how to teach your teen to drive, read these 15 blog articles.

Set a Good Example
Everyone is susceptible to road rage on occasion, and you’ve likely pushed the speed limit once or twice in your life. Think about your driving habits before you start teaching your teen to drive and fix any bad habits now, because your child is watching and learning driving habits years before he gets his learner’s permit. It’s never too early to start talking about defensive driving tips with your teen, and these five blog entries are full of tips to help you exhibit and teach good driving skills for your child.
Know the Rules
Try to think back to when you took the driver’s test to get your own learner’s permit.  Do you remember the questions on the test?  If it’s been 20 years or so since you took the test, you probably need a refresher. After all, a lot of things can change in 20 years! Check out these five blog posts to learn why knowing the rules is necessary before starting driving lessons with your child.
Plan Out Your Lessons
Before you get into the car with your teen it’s a good idea to plan out what you’re going to teach him. Start slowly by making sure that he knows how to adjust and work everything in the car.  Driving down the road in a sudden rain shower is no place to realize that he doesn’t know how to turn on the windshield wipers. These five blog postings will give you more tips on how you can break up your lessons.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Internet Addiction and Teen Depression

Depression is common among teenagers; each year, an estimated 2 million teens and preteens develop clinical depression, and last year the federal government recommended that all teenagers be screened for depression. So parents may want to note the link between “Internet addiction” and depression, and keep a closer eye on children who depend on screen time as a pacifier or mood stabilizer. A recent study also found a correlation between video game use and ADHD. Like the “Internet addiction” study, no causal link has been proven, but one-third of children exceed the two hours of daily TV and computer screen time recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics. Setting limits on screen time— and enforcing them—can really help.

Before school opens, sit down with your teenager.  Set limits, set boundaries and most importantly explain to your teen why it is important to stay healthy and how spending extended amount of time in front of a computer screen is not healthy.  Explaining that depression is not only common in teens, it is also a growing problem in adults.  The time is now to take care of their emotional health.

Signs of teenage depression:

  • Sadness or hopelessness
  • Irritability, anger, or hostility
  • Tearfulness or frequent crying
  • Withdrawal from friends and family
  • Loss of interest in activities
  • Changes in eating and sleeping habits
  • Restlessness and agitation
  • Feelings of worthlessness and guilt
  • Lack of enthusiasm and motivation
  • Fatigue or lack of energy
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Thoughts of death or suicide
Be an educated parent, you will have safer and healthier teens! 

Communication is key! Start talking today!

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

30 Blogs to Get Kids Away from the TV

According to the Nielsen Company, the average kid watches approximately four hours of television per day. When you add in computer, tablet and cell phone usage, the amount of screen time goes up to about 53 hours per week. The Mayo Clinic in Rochester, MN has said that excessive screen time is a contributor to childhood obesity and reduces kids’ ability to focus.  Most parents would prefer their children watch less television, but accomplishing this isn’t always easy. Instead of going cold turkey, gradually reduce the amount of time your child watches TV.

These 30 blog articles are full of activities your child can do to replace their normal screen time.

Exercise
The rise in childhood obesity is one of the major reasons that doctors want to reduce the amount of television time that kids engage in. Instead of watching television, try to get your kids involved in some sort of exercise. Exercising doesn’t have to mean going for a run or participating in a sport; you can get your kids active by encouraging activities like jumping on a trampoline or playing tag in the front yard. Involve the entire family in some sort of physical activity and you can all get fit together. These five blog entries will help get your started.
Outdoor Games
Summertime means that kids have a lot of extra free time on their hands, and if they don’t have planned activities they can end up spending hours in front of the TV. Instead of letting them sit in front of the screen all day, encourage them to get outdoors and play. Take a look at these five blog posts to get ideas for what your kids can do outside.
Crafts
Craft projects are a great way to get your kids doing something other than watching TV or playing on the computer, and many crafts can be done outdoors. Check out these five blog articles for some creative inspiration.   
Hobbies
Hobbies are a great way to occupy time, whether it’s getting out into nature and bird watching or taking on a new sport. Brainstorm different ideas for hobbies with your kids and find some that fit their interests. For ideas and tips for finding the perfect hobby, read these five blog entries.
Cooking
Are your kids picky eaters? Do they get bored easily? You can solve both of these problems by getting your kids into the kitchen. There are many kid cookbooks that feature recipes that are easily understood by kids, and spending time in the kitchen can be a fun activity for you to enjoy together. For tips on how to get started cooking with your kids, look at these five blog posts.
Indoor Fun
While the dog days of summer are known for being full of sunshine and hot weather, some days will inevitably be filled with storm clouds and rain. On those days it’s a good idea to have some indoor activities tucked away for the kids to do. Unfortunately there are days that are rainy or just too hot to send the kids outside to play. These five blog posts are full of fun indoor activities; your kids won’t even miss the TV!
Source:  NannyWebsites.com 

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Teens and Social Networking Addiction

Does your teen's life revolve around Facebook?


The Faculty of Psychology at the University of Bergen in Norway has found that Facebook addiction is real, and younger Facebook users, including teens, are the most susceptible to addiction.

Facebook addiction, like any addiction, has noticeably detrimental effects. It interferes with a person’s day-to-day life and causes him or her to neglect responsibilities. For your teen, this could mean that Facebook dependence could interfere with academic performance and have a negative impact on your child’s relationships with family members and friends. With some research linking excessive social media use to depression in teens, Facebook addiction could even take a toll on your teen’s mental health.

The researchers at the University of Bergen have developed a Facebook addiction scale that helps determine whether someone is unhealthily dependent on Facebook.

Here are some of the warning signs that could indicate that your teen is addicted to Facebook, according to their research:

1. Your teen spends an excessive amount of time on Facebook and plans his or her day around using the social media site.
2. Your son or daughter's Facebook use has steadily increased since he or she began using the website.
3. Facebook seems to be a means of escaping from the pressures of everyday life for your teen.
4. When Facebook time is limited, your child becomes agitated and upset.
5. Homework and studying takes a backseat to Facebook, and your child's grades suffer. His or her dreams of getting into an Ivy League college have fallen by the wayside. Facebook is now your teen's top priority.

Since Facebook addiction is a relatively recent phenomenon, there isn't much research that indicates how to treat it. Researchers have been aware of internet addiction, which is similar in many respects to Facebook addiction, for a while.

If you want to help treat your son or daughter's Facebook addiction, you might want to try out some of these strategies, which are based on the findings of internet addiction researchers at the University of California, San Francisco:

1. Sit down with your teen and come up with a list of all of his or her favorite activities that aren't related to Facebook. Take the list out whenever your child has some free time, and encourage him or her to take part in the activities on the list.
2. Set time limits for your teen's internet use. If your teen's only able to spend forty-five minutes on the computer each evening, it'll be rather difficult for him or her to stay addicted to Facebook. If you try out this strategy, you can expect that your teen won't be very happy at first. Just remember that you're the parent, you're in control, and you're doing what's best for your child.
3. Reward your teen for decreased Facebook use. Each week or month your child uses Facebook appropriately, reward him or her with a book, movie, mp3, trip to the museum, or other incentive. This will help encourage healthy internet habits and encourage interest in other forms of entertainment that are separate from Facebook.
4. If your teen's Facebook addiction is particularly worrisome, consider therapy and medication options. Certain types of medication have worked wonders for people with internet addiction. Talk to your family doctor about treatment in the form of medication, and consider setting up an appointment for your teen to meet with a therapist.

Facebook addiction is a real problem. If you think your teen is dependent on Facebook, it's your job to be proactive about it and nip the dependence in the bud. The life of a teenager should be exciting and full of opportunities. So, don't let any sort of addiction hinder your child's growth into a healthy and happy adult.

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Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Teens and Data Plans: Does Your Teenager Need Internet on Their Cell Phone?

Teenagers in today’s society have a wealth of information at their fingertips. Just by using a web-enabled cell phone, they have access to everything the internet has to offer. News outlets across the United States have reported the unseen dangers, but many parents remain unaware of the trouble that can result.

Here are ten reasons you might want to consider canceling your teen’s data plan.
  1. Difficult to Monitor – Despite the parental controls that some service providers offer, a tech-savvy teen can still hide their tracks on a mobile device.
  2. Sexually Inappropriate Content – Not having a data plan makes sending questionable images to another cell phone much more difficult. The lack of online capabilities can greatly reduce the access your teen has to sexually inappropriate content, whether that means pornography or sharing ill-advised photos of themselves.
  3. Bullying – The bullying epidemic among older kids and teens is no secret. Limiting the capabilities of your teen’s cell phone can help protect them from some forms of bullying, or prevent them from being a bully to others.
  4. The Distraction Factor – Today’s teens spend an enormous amount of time using social networking sites from their phones, leaving them completely distracted from the world around them. Not having the ability to access such sites at their fingertips throughout the entirety of their day forces them to interact with their surroundings; everything from their grades to the conversation at the dinner table can improve when there’s no media plan available.
  5. Cheating – Having access to search engines during a difficult test can tempt even the most honest teen. Removing that temptation can help steer your teen away from making a decision that can have an adverse effect on their academic future.
  6. Usage Fees – The charges for data usage can be exorbitant, especially if your teen is downloading music, games and ringtones. Opting to have data usage disabled can save a small fortune, especially if you have more than one teenager on a family plan.
  7. Driving Dangers – While disabling data use doesn’t prevent texting, it can limit the available distractions. Have a talk with your teen driver about the dangers of texting while driving, but it might be a good idea to also consider dropping the data plan from their line for this reason as well.
  8. Peer Pressure and Risky Behavior – Today, everything from nudity to fighting is encouraged among groups of teens, simply for the purpose of recording and sharing the photos and video footage. Limiting the capabilities of your teen’s device can curtail his or her involvement in such risky or illegal behavior.
  9. Spreading of Harmful Rumors and Gossip – Though most wouldn’t use the term “blackmail,” that’s exactly what some teens are doing when they use photos and video caught on a cell phone to torment a classmate. Though disabling your teen’s data usage won’t protect them from being the victim of voyeurism, it will prevent them from sharing embarrassing footage of others.
  10. Too Much Information – Many social networking sites like Facebook offer the ability to “check in” from a mobile device. This publishes the user’s current location, sometimes complete with a map. For naïve teens, this doesn’t seem like an issue, but it can be dangerous if their privacy settings allow strangers to see the information.
Simply restricting your teen’s access to these services won’t keep them safe from the dangers of our high-tech society. It’s imperative to explain your reasons for not allowing mobile web access, and to have a conversation about the behaviors that a cell phone simply documents.

Join me on Facebook and follow me on Twitter for more information and educational articles on parenting today's teenagers.

Sunday, July 7, 2013

Teaching Teens and Kids About Saving Money This Summer

One of the most important skills for an adult to have in order to successfully manage her life and achieve independence is a strong grasp of how to effectively save and manage money. Unfortunately, this is also a skill that many parents find difficult to pass along. In the interest of helping your children grow into financially independent adults that know how to spend money responsibly, it’s essential that you begin instilling these skills at a young age. These hints can help you build the foundation for money saving habits, helping to ensure that your kids gain the skills they need to see them into the future.

Set Savings Goals
It’s tempting to give in to kids’ requests for big-ticket items, but you’re running the risk of instilling a sense of entitlement and passing up a valuable opportunity to foster strong money management skills by giving in to their whims. Instead of rushing out to make a pricey purchase, talk to your child about ways that he can save the money himself and then help him to reach that goal. Many kids operate best when they have a tangible end goal, rather than a vague idea of saving money “for a rainy day.” This also helps kids to understand the importance of not buying things they can’t afford, which can lead to dangerous credit over-extension later in life.
Give Kids a Structured Allowance
Giving kids an allowance is a time-honored tradition, but you can help your kids learn valuable money saving skills by insisting that a certain portion of their allowance be saved, while the rest is available for spending. When the habit of automatically setting some money aside is established early, the concept of saving as an adult isn’t so difficult to wrestle with. This also simulates the experience of paying bills and managing expenses, making that experience a less traumatic one than it would be if those lessons were learned in young adulthood.
Use Cash When Kids are Small
Older kids may love watching the numbers in a bank statement climb, but little ones will respond better to concrete representations of their amassed wealth. Use transparent jars as banks, and actively try to generate excitement as those jars are filled with cash. Depositing the lump sum into a savings account later will help to teach account management, but watching their stash physically grow will be more exciting when your children are too young to adequately grasp the concept of a bank balance.
Take Advantage of Everyday Teaching Opportunities
From talking about big sales to discussing unit price, there are a plethora of opportunities in everyday life that present themselves for the teaching of savings skills. Talking to kids about living frugally and setting money aside is easier when you’re discussing the concept you’re demonstrating. Remember, kids learn more about the world from observing their parents and other trusted adults than most people realize. Discussing how much things cost can also give kids a more realistic view of money as a tangible object in finite supply.
Open Savings Accounts With Older Kids
While younger children will respond best to watching their money physically grow, older kids need to learn the essential skills that are required to successfully maintain a balance in their bank account. Take your child to the bank and discuss the options for savings accounts while he’s there to listen. Walk him through the basics, and make sure that he understands that you’re there to help him. You may be surprised at the insightful questions he asks about account management.
Give Kids Independence Over Their Spending Decisions
In order to truly learn about financial responsibility, kids need to have some measure of independence over their savings. This means that you’ll have to allow him to make a mistake or two in order to learn from them. Don’t berate him for mistakes or jump to bail him out of the mess. Instead, take the time to talk about what went wrong and how to fix the situation responsibly. Remember that every mistake is a learning experience for your child, especially when it comes to money management.

Source:   GoNannies.com

Saturday, June 29, 2013

Teenagers Online: The Challenge of Keeping Them Safe

What can parents do to keep their teens safe online?

 Parenting has been a frightening proposition since the beginning of time, but parents today are faced with challenges no generation has ever faced: raising children who have spent their entire lives immersed in the Internet and social media. Here we take a look at the threats and the safeguards that make a virtually impossible task manageable. The big bad Internet can be tamed, and your kids can  be kept safe. The Teenage Online Landmine

Image source: www.bestcounselingdegrees.net  


Cyberbullying - 88% of teens say they have seen someone be mean or cruel to another person on a social network.1
- 26% of teens and young adults say someone has written something about them on an Internet page that wasn’t true.
- 16% say someone has put up embarrassing pictures or videos of them on an Internet page without their permission.
Take Action:
- Teach kids: don’t respond to online bullying; report it to an adult.
- Change passwords if suspicious activity is suspected.
- Teach kids how to block bullies on various social sites.
- Report harassment to website admins.
Gaming
- 82% of children claim to be gamers
- 51% of kid gamers play online
- 47%: teens who play online games with people they know in real life
- Fighting Games: middle school boys’ favorite style of game (and girls’ least favorite)
- 13%: percentage of underage teens to successfully buy mature-rated games
- Take action:
- Treat game consoles with the same Internet caution as a computer.
- Limit gaming features: No webcams!
- Avoid using real names in gamertags or screen names.
- Keep the game console out of the bedroom and in an openly observable location in the home.
- Beware of free downloadable games online, which can be packaged with viruses and spyware
Porn
- 93% of boys are exposed to porn online before the age of 18.
- 62% of girls
- 70%: percentage of boys who have looked at online porn for at least 30 minutes straight
- HALF of those boys have done so at least 10 times.
- (Compared to 23% for girls, 14% more than once)
- 39% of boys and 23% of girls have seen online sex acts involving bondage.
- 32: percentage of boys who have seen acts of bestiality online (girls, 18%)
- Rape or sexual violence: witnessed online by 18% of boys and 10% of girls
- 1 in 7 boys and 1 in 10 girls have seen child pornography online
- 13% of web searches are for erotic content
- Take Action:
- Teach kids never to click on unfamiliar links or search results
- Purchase blocking software and use parental controls for browsers
- Keep computers and mobile device use in readily observable locations in the home
- BE OPEN to discussing anything with your children. Let them know and see it’s safe to talk to you.
- Use Internet accountability services to get reports of online use
- Beware anonymizers, sites that conceal your child’s Internet activity. A good Internet accountability service will recognize them.
Online Predators
- “The offenders lure teens after weeks of conversations with them, they play on teens’ desires for romance, adventure, sexual information, understanding, and they lure them to encounters that the teens know are sexual in nature.” Dr. David Finkelhor, Director of the Crimes against Children research center
- Most victims of online predators are teens.
- Most victims know they are talking to an adult.
- 50%: percentage of victims who claim to be in love with their predators
- Most teens ignore or delete messages from strangers
- Most sexual predation occurs with someone not considered a total stranger when the relationship begins.
The victims:
- 76 % are between the ages of 13 and 15
- 75% are female
- The predators:
- 99% are male
- 76% are 26+ years in age
- 20 years: almost half of predators are two decades older than their victims
- Chat rooms: the leading initial meeting place (76%)
- Only 5% pretend to be close to the same age as their victims
- Take action:
- Don’t be overly protective to the point of paranoia. Most online activity is fine, and paranoid parents can increase the risk of alienating their children.
- Let your children know what is and isn’t okay to talk about online.
- Look for red flags: increased secrecy and emotional obsession with internet use, withdrawal from friends and family
- Talk openly (not threateningly) with your kids about their online relationships.
Sexting
- 20%: teens who have transmitted nude or seminude images of themselves
- 39%: teens who have transmitted sexually suggestive messages
Take Action:
- Talk to teens about their definition of privacy: reality TV has completely altered that concept.
- Talk about sexual values and morals
Social Networks
- 55% of kids have a facebook account by the time they’re 12
- 40% of teens have observed illegal or underage drug abuse by their peers on social networks
- More than 1 in 10 teens use social media over three hours a day
- Those teens are almost twice as likely as their peers to binge drink, experiment with drugs, and be sexually promiscuous.
- Take Action:
- Be the decision maker on which social networks your children use and when they’re old enough to join.
- Always be a member of the sites your children join.
- Check browser history for social network use
- Google your child’s name periodically to check for online presence
- Employ Internet Accountability software
- Learn about and adjust the privacy settings on your child’s social networks
- Be clear with your child about what is acceptable to post-make sure they’re sticking to the rules.
- Source: http://www.covenanteyes.com/parenting-the-internet-generation/

Friday, June 21, 2013

Book Clubs: Tips to Start One This Summer

For people who love to read and be social, a book club can be the perfect outlet. Book clubs are a chance to kick back and unwind with friends over a shared interest. If you’re just starting a book club, pick one evening a month to sit back with a group of friends and discuss a book the group previously decided to read. Dissect the characters, the plot and the writing while enjoying food, drinks and good company. Need to occupy the kids for the night? Have them form a kids book club! Can’t commit to a regular monthly meeting? Start or join an online book club forum.

Take a look at these 21 blog posts for plenty of helpful information on starting a book club for adults, kids or online.

Adults
Before you start a book club, you need to consider how many people you want to include and if it’s an open club or one that’s by invite only. You’ll also want to decide if you’re going to focus on one particular genre or if you’re going to read books from all walks of life. These seven blog entries will help you work through the details and figure out where to begin.  
Kids
Starting a book club for kids can help kids improve their reading comprehension, as well as expose them to the idea that people can have different viewpoints on the same thing. While the focus of a book club for children should be about having fun, kids will still learn a lot from taking part in a book club.  These seven blog articles will help you get started.
Virtual
Sometimes life is too hectic for regular book club gatherings, and the only way you can engage in a book club is if it’s online. With the integration of social media and the internet, starting a virtual book club is easier than ever. Read through these seven blog posts to learn how others have done it and what they considered before getting started.
Source:  Nanny Websites

Saturday, June 15, 2013

Tweens and Facebook: Should They Be Allowed on Facebook?

This is a question that has been lingering for the past couple of years.  We know that kids under 13 are joining, but should they be?

The brave new world of technology has expanded so far that even your grandmother may have an account on the social networking clearinghouse that is Facebook. The fact that your elderly relatives have adopted Facebook, however, doesn’t mean that your child is ready to tackle the social media giant.

When your tween is pleading with you for permission to start a Facebook account and swearing that all of their friends have them, these are 10 of the reasons why you might want to stick to your guns and continue to ban the site for a few more years.
  1. Bullying – Being bullied is a devastating situation, even for teenagers and young adults, but tweens are even more likely to be overwhelmed by bullies online. Kids who aren’t victims of bullying may also find themselves joining in with the crowd picking on another youngster in the no-holds-barred world of the Internet.
  2. Exposure to Questionable Content – Even if your preteen is never approached by a sexual predator, she’s still likely to come across photos or status updates that simply aren’t age appropriate. A child who doesn’t have a Facebook account may be protected from that objectionable content for a bit longer, though.
  3. Online Predators – Sexual predators lurking online are such a problem that entire television series have been dedicated to sting operations designed to catch them. Preteens simply aren’t equipped to properly fend off approaches from predators, and may be more susceptible to their techniques than older kids.
  4. They’re Not Technically Allowed to Have Accounts – If you don’t prohibit Facebook use for your preteen for any other reason, you should consider the fact that allowing them to start an account is tantamount to telling them that it’s okay to lie. Facebook doesn’t allow users younger than 13, so your child will have to falsify her age in order to sign up. Doing so with your permission is effectively sending a message that lying is acceptable behavior if you’re lying to get something you really want.
  5. Reducing Screen Time – Between television, video games and time spent online for homework purposes, kids spend enough of their day planted in front of an electronic screen. Facebook is just another way for your child to while away the hours in sedentary activity, rather than getting outside and being active.
  6. Preserving Academic Performance – When your child is supposed to be online researching homework methods or studying for a big test, his shiny new Facebook account can be a very serious distraction. Kids so young may have difficulty controlling their impulses, and may spend far more time on the social media site than they do actually working.
  7. Protecting Your Computer from Malware – You and your teenagers may have a basic idea of how to avoid malware and spyware sent out by unscrupulous Facebook users, but your tween probably doesn’t. Keeping your child off of social media for a few more years can also be your computer’s saving grace.
  8. Because Kids Lack Adult Judgment – The fact that college students post photographs of binge drinking parties and incriminating status updates at an alarming rate is proof that young people don’t always have the best judgment when it comes to social networking. For a young child, not understanding acceptable Facebook use could lead to them sharing very sensitive personal information that later proves to be dangerous.
  9. Friends Lists Can Be Difficult to Manage – When the friend requests start rolling in, your tween will probably accept each and every one of them because it makes her feel well-liked and cool. That can give some shady characters access to her profile, something she may have trouble understanding when she’s still so young.
  10. Tech-Savvy Tweens Can Block Your Monitoring Efforts – Some preteens may have trouble avoiding malware and managing a friends list, but others will be tech-savvy enough to filter their updates and change security settings that affect what you’re able to see. Even if you think you’re monitoring your child, you may only be seeing a fraction of the things she does online.
Yoursphere1If you still think that your preteen is mature and trustworthy enough to have a Facebook account without getting into trouble, the decision is up to you. Be warned, however, that your child could find all of her hard work tossed to the wayside if Facebook administrators discover that she’s maintaining an account before she’s reached the age limit set in the terms of use and decide to delete the account.

Source:  Babysitting Jobs

Need a great alternative to Facebook for tweens?  Check out Yoursphere!  It is designed for that age group where safety for your child is their priority!

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Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Teens Smoking Cigarettes: Quick Facts

Many parents call me about their teens and sometimes tweens that are lighting up.  We like to say pick and choose issues, and we don’t condone smoking cigarettes – but we can’t panic. 

Continue talking to our kid about how damaging smoking cigarettes is to your body as well as your overall health.  Smoking is not cool – but it is cool to be an educated parent.  More survey's and research is proving today that our kid's are listening to parents and they are the biggest influence on their children.  First and foremost, they have to be a good role model. 

Most people who smoke first light up a cigarette when they’re teens. In fact, 80% of smokers began the habit before they turned 18.

Here are a few quick facts about cigarette smoking, nicotine and tobacco that you may not have heard before. Even if you have, they’re facts that are worth keeping in mind when your friends and relatives light up a cigarette.
  1. Nearly 70% of people who smoke say they wish they could quit.
  2. Teens who smoke cough and wheeze three times more than teens who don’t smoke.
  3. Smoking causes cancer, heart disease, lung disease and strokes.
  4. Smokers as young as 18 years old have shown evidence of developing heart disease.
  5. More than 70% of young people who smoke said they wish they hadn’t started doing it.
  6. Smoking a pack of cigarettes each day costs about $1,500 per year — enough money to buy a new computer or Xbox.
  7. Studies show that 43% of people who smoke three or fewer cigarettes a day become addicted to nicotine.
  8. More than 434,000 Americans die each year from smoking-related diseases.
  9. One-third of all new smokers will eventually die from a smoking-related disease.
  10. Nicotine — one of the main ingredients in cigarettes — is a poison.
  11. Nicotine is as addictive as heroin and cocaine.
  12. All tobacco products — that includes cigarettes, cigars and chewing tobacco — have nicotine in them.
  13. Smoking makes you feel weaker and more tired because it prevents oxygen from reaching your heart.
  14. Smoking decreases your sense of taste and smell, making you enjoy things like flowers and ice cream a little bit less.
  15. Smoking hurts the people around you: More than 53,000 people die each year from secondhand smoke.
  16. Cigarettes have tons of harmful chemicals in them, including ammonia (found in toilet cleaner), carbon monoxide (found in car exhaust) and arsenic (found in rat poison).
  17. Quitting smoking is one of the best things you can do for your health.
  18. Just days after quitting smoking, a person’s sense of taste and smell returns to normal.
  19. Ten years after quiting smoking, a person’s risk of lung cancer and heart disease returns to that of a non-smoker.
  20. Most teens (about 70%) don’t smoke. Plus, if you make it through your teen years without becoming a smoker, chances are you’ll never become a smoker.
Adapted from “50 Things You Should Know About Tobacco” by Journeyworks Publishing.

Monday, May 20, 2013

Why Teenagers Should Have a Summer Job

 
Summer is around the corner and the question is common, should your teen get a job?  In some families it is a necessity if they want a cell phone or other gadgets that the parents don't have in their budget.  Personally, I believe a teen should have a job to learn a sense of responsibility.

With shows like “My Super Sweet 16” that glorify teens have extravagant lives and demanding over the top birthday parties we’ve become inundated with the idea that our teens need to be pampered and spoiled beyond reason. This mindset has led to teens believing that they deserve the most expensive clothes, cars, and cell phones, and that these things should just be handed to them on demand. The reality of it, though, is that our teenagers should be learning the importance of working hard for what they want, and one way to impart this lesson and have them reap the benefits of it is by having them work a part-time job.

There are numerous lessons and values teens will learn from working:

1.     Time management:  Having to balance school and work will teach teens early on the importance of prioritizing responsibilities and managing their time. The sooner they learn how to do this the better off they’ll be when they leave for college and eventually branch out into the real world of full-time jobs and responsibilities.
2.     Help build a resume:  Being able to list work experience on a resume will help your teen get ahead of the crowd when it comes time to apply for college or find a full-time job. It will show prospective colleges and employers that your teen is a motivated, hard-working individual and will set them above the people who have no prior work experience.
3.     Financial independence:  There’s a certain satisfaction that is brought about by being able to buy something you want with your own hard-earned money, and having a job that brings in a paycheck will allow teens to learn how to effectively manage their money and rely on themselves and not their parents for different purchases. Learning to manage money is a life skill that everyone needs to have, so learning it early on will only benefit your teenager.
4.     Develop indispensable life skills:  Your teen will learn very quickly the importance of working as a team and having solid communication skills, two talents that are transferrable into almost any industry or experience. The experiences that they have, both good and bad, from a part-time job will help them to become better-rounded as an individual.
5.     Learn the value of hard work:  Unfortunately hard work is becoming more under-valued these days, especially with teens, and it’s important to teach our kids that hard work is a trait to be admired and respected. Learning to work for what you want is an advantageous tool to have.
While your teens may complain about having to get a job initially, it’s likely that they’ll end up thanking you for it in the long run. The lessons they’ll learn from having to work a part-time job are irreplaceable.

Author Bio
Heather Smith is an ex-nanny. Passionate about thought leadership and writing, Heather regularly contributes to various career, social media, public relations, branding, and parenting blogs/websites. She also provides value to nanny service by giving advice on site design as well as the features and functionality to provide more and more value to nannies and families across the U.S. and Canada. She can be available at H.smith7295 [at] gmail.com.

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Saturday, May 11, 2013

College Choices and Options for Your Teenager

Nothing is more difficult as a parent than watching your babies leave the nest.


This moment can happen at any age, but one of the most common associations is on the day they start college courses.

Even if your child will be living at home for a few years when they start school, the beginning of college still marks the beginning of their adult life. So, how do you prepare your kids for the process of choosing a college based on their needs? And, how do you do this while recognizing that this decision is, ultimately, up to your child?

Even though this can feel like a thin tight rope to walk, and you may be more nervous about your child’s choice of college than he or she is, it is still very important to have a discussion with your teen about future college plans. In fact, this conversation can be helpful for you both.

Here are some good tips for going about it:

1. Be realistic about your expectations.  This is probably the most important step parents need to reach in order to have a successful talk with their teen about college. There is nothing wrong about setting high standards for your children and having high hopes for the education that they will pursue after graduation, especially if you intend to pay for it. However, you have to remember that, once they graduate high school, your kids’ lives are technically in their own hands. They will be of the age to make their own decisions and determine their own futures. So, parents need to reach a healthy balance of personal expectations and allowing their children the freedom to follow their own dreams before a conversation can be had.

2. Figure out how they feel.  The next step after you have come to terms with your own expectations is to figure out what your child’s expectations are for him or herself. Starting in on page twenty when your kid has only thought about college to about page four won’t really work. Likewise, falsely assuming your child is starting at square one when, in fact, he or she has been researching schools for months is another way to start the conversation off on the wrong foot. Instead, ask your child how much time they have spent thinking about going to college. Then, ask them what they have been feeling about it. Figure out where your kids are in the process before you carry on with a discussion.

3. Make sure they understand the commitment.  There is more to college than picking a school and signing up. College students are no longer on a high school timetable where they attend school from 8 to 3 every day and have their schedules lined up for them. In college, your child will be responsible for getting himself to class on his own and getting work done in a timely manner without parental supervision. There is also a huge financial commitment involved in enrollment. Once you know your child’s plans, you can discuss with them the realities of those plans and how they mesh with the realities of what your family can provide.

4. Ask what you can do to help.  Instead of becoming a dictator in your child’s college search, simply ask what you can do to help the process. Ultimately, unless your child wants you to choose a school for them, the choice of where to go and what to study is up to your kid, so you should simply act as a form of help and guidance in the process. Let them know that you are there for them, no matter what. If your teenager doesn’t seem to know how to take the first steps toward figuring out college plans, then you can step in and provide a little direction by setting up school visits and looking for information about degree plans.

5. Suggest other sources of guidance.  If your teen is less than enthusiastic about working with you on college plans, you can refer them to someone you trust to provide insight and advice. Try suggesting that they talk to their favorite teacher, a college-aged cousin, or anyone else who has their best interests at heart for help along the way.

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Wednesday, April 17, 2013

April is Alcohol Awareness Month: MADD Power of Parents

From MADD - Power of Parents

April is Alcohol Awareness Month, which is one of the reasons why we chose April 21st as PowerTalk 21 day, the national day for parents and teens to talk about alcohol.
Of all the dangers teens face, underage drinking is among the worst. 

Compared with non-drinking classmates, teens who drink are more likely to:
  • Die in a car crash
  • Get pregnant
  • Flunk school
  • Be sexually assaulted
  • Become an alcoholic later in life
  • Take their own life through suicide
The longer a teen waits to start drinking, the safer he or she will stay.  Both parents and teens can be part of the solution.

Parents play an important role in a teen’s decision to drink.  In fact, 74% of teens say their parents are the number one influence on their decision to drink.

MADD knows that informed, caring parents can make a difference, and we’re here to help.

Download the latest version of the Power of Parents handbook for tips and tools to help you start the potentially lifesaving conversation about alcohol with your teens.  And, we are giving away an iPad to one lucky parent who downloads the handbook during April.  You can also find additional tips and expert resources at madd.org/powerofparents.

We also have a Power of You(th) booklet available.  This research-based booklet for teens helps you take a stand against underage drinking, for both yourself and your friends.
Together, we can prevent underage drinking and help teens meet their full potential.

Learn more at www.madd.org.