We hear about bullets that kill people. Gun control is a topic that
is not going away. However there is another type of bullet that can
ruin lives in a different form--and can be just as deadly. Cyber-bullets.
Sadly, hearing about online attacks by and between kids has become
almost commonplace these days. But attacks against adults are an
epidemic onto themselves. As someone who was a target, I know this
first-hand, but it’s amazing that far too few people understand the
extent to which online hostility and attacks impacts adults as well.
Andrea Weckerle, both through CiviliNation, the non-profit she founded, and her new book Civility in the Digital Age: How Companies and People can Triumph Over Haters, Trolls, Bullies, and Other Jerks is trying to change that. (Disclosure: I serve as an Advisor to CiviliNation.)
Her book outlines the problems we see online (the real-life examples
she provides are often raw and hard-hitting), and also offers solutions
in the form of best practices and techniques.
She starts by explaining why measuring and monitoring one’s online
reputation is important, and breaks down how to do that. She also goes
into considerable detail about what types of conflict we’re likely to
encounter online (these can range from one-on-one interpersonal conflict
to conflict with people who are pseudonymous or anonymous, to online
lynch mobs), as well as who the most common troublemakers are
(cyberbullies, online harassers and defamers, trolls, sockpuppets, and a
host of difficult people). Of particular interest is the information
about anger management, which includes insights into how to manage one’s
own anger online and how to deal with those who are aggressively
spouting off, both which are super important in the hyper-intense online
environment. The chapter on conflict resolution skills and strategies
get into nitty-gritty how-tos.
But it’s the chapter “30-Day Pan for better Conflict Management
Online” that provides detailed information on how to put knowledge into
action. Day 1, for example, explains how to start your conflict
inventory and assessment, while Day 11 and Day 12 discuss choosing an
online monitoring tool and setting up an online conflict tracking
system, Meanwhile, Day 17, covers how to determine whether you need to
bury or remove negative information about you online, and Day 29 talks
about how to simulate an online conflict crisis.
“Civility in the Digital Age” is a serious book, but it’s also very hopeful.
In the last chapter, Weckerle quotes serial entrepreneur and
environmentalist Paul Hawken who says “If we see only the worst, it
destroys our capacity to do something. If we remember those times and
places—and there are so many—where people have behaved magnificently,
this gives us the energy to act, and at least the possibility of sending
this spinning top of a world in a different direction.” Weckerle
writes, “Hawken’s words are relevant to the online world, where you see
both the best and the worst of humanity expressed. But if you’ve read
this book, it’s clear you’re not willing to turn a blind eye to the
egregious behavior found online—you want to make things better!”
And don’t we all want to do that?
In my opinion, if you are online today, you need to read this book.
Order on Amazon today!
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